This week’s tip: Be a leader people want to follow.
A staff member stops you in the hall and asks for a minute to talk with you. What you say shows what you value. Look at the two responses below.
“I am sorry. I have an appointment. I’ll get back to you later.”
“You are more important than a moment of my time. What do you need?”
The first response makes the person feel dismissed. The second makes the person feel valued.
The second response does not need to take more time. It allows you, the leader, to hear what the issue is and then decide how to help one of three ways:
A First Responder can help you faster. Please see Joyce, the counselor. Let me know if want to talk with me after.
This issue deserves more of my focus and time than a minute in the hallway. Please see my SAM to schedule.
Change your plan.
Why would you change your plan? Well, if a teacher told you their spouse was in a car accident and on the way to the hospital, wouldn’t your best move be to cover the class and get the teacher safely to the hospital? Your TimeTrack plan is just that. Your plan. What you do will change sometimes…and should, when the issue is truly urgent.
The purpose of the SAM Communications Protocol is to triage issues, or interruptions. In medicine, triage means to “conduct a preliminary assessment of patients or casualties in order to determine the urgency of their need for treatment and the nature of treatment required.” A good SAM principal never says no. Instead, the SAM principal expresses interest and concern and then triages the issues.
Language makes a difference. Developing a habit of expressing interest, and asking questions, can go far beyond the First Responder system.
Here’ are a few phrases you might try:
Would you be interesting in trying something new?
Would you try a different approach if it might improve your relationship with a student?
If you were going to try this, what would it look like?
How would you feel if you were the student?
Would you try this if we did it together?
If you were going to try this, which of these three options would appeal?
If/then phrasing as a support rather than a threat: If you try this, I promise I will support you whether it works, or not.
Don’t worry. We can fix this. Frequently, the leader can greatly reduce the stress by expressing confidence in others. This too, shall pass. We can handle it, together.
I am proud of you for facing this issue.
Keep in mind, managing a conversation in a positive way requires you to ask more questions than sharing thoughts or making statements. It is important to remember this simple truth: The person who controls a conversation is the one asking the most questions. If you match this behavior with sincere care and empathy, you will be a leader others will want to follow.
I hope you have a wonderful and restful Christmas and a very happy New Year. We are excited about the annual National SAM Conference. Friday was “assembly day”.
It actually took us two days this year to assemble to the attendee bags with padfolios, agendas, maps and a surprise tech gift. Take a look at the entry to our offices. What you are seeing are half of the attendee materials ready for loading in a trailer and truck that Carol and I will drive to Miami the week before the conference…along with 3,000 books, stage pieces and tech equipment. Fun!
If you are coming this year, you will receive several emails over Christmas vacation/winter break. If not, consider attending next year and look for the HD videos of the keynote sessions, Use this link to see the final agenda for the conference this year: https://bit.ly/3ZSp6Vk
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